THE AWKWARD MOM

because uncomfortable conversations are the ones worth having

Tag: divorce

Grieving After Divorce: How to Help a Friend

Reading Time: 6 minutes

grieving after divorce

Genevieve’s voice poured through the phone to me. She’s a former pastor’s wife still wading through court proceedings following a horrific, jarring divorce. That’s not to mention the affair, the pregnant mistress, the mental disorders and gaslighting.  Her descriptions called to mind a life upturned, shaken violently, spilled. How do you help a friend grieving after divorce?

Some pieces of her former life had temporarily skittered beyond vision: Her ally in the world’s onslaught. Financial security. A co-parent and advocate for their boys. Her helper to pick up the kids or fix the washing machine. A calm presence after a nightmare. Someone to process the day with. A lover of her body. read more

Is Your Friend Considering Divorce? Ways to Help

Reading Time: 2 minutes

divorce

Heartrending news landed in the New York Post this week: Divorce rates spiked 34% between March and June this year.

According to the article, 31% admitted quarantine caused “irreparable damage” to their relationships. read more

Rachel Hollis’ Divorce: How Should We Respond?

Reading Time: 6 minutes

Rachel Hollis carries that mysterious polarizing power. People tend to either love her or…not love her. 

Let’s pretend you don’t know who she is, m’kay? Hollis’ resume boasts what most of ours never will. She’s a #1 New York Times Bestselling author whose nonfiction (Girl, Wash Your Face and Girl, Stop Apologizing) has sold over 3 million copies. Once crowned among Inc. magazine’s “Top 30 Entrepreneurs under 30,” she owns The Hollis Group, which encourages people toward “positive and lasting change.”  read more

What to Do About the Person You Thought You’d Marry

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Who did you think you’d marry?

My husband–I unearthed this a few years into our marriage, when we finally had the fortitude to be more vulnerable with each other–thought he’d marry someone more athletic. (I am laughing out loud as I type. Poor guy.) To his credit, when he met me, I was running every morning, performing pushups and situps at night. We played intermural sports and pickup games of soccer together. We hiked together. And to my own credit, I still live an active lifestyle. But none of these has approved the actual coordination factor.

(My parents laugh about me as a child falling repeatedly into the same hole in the yard on my way over to the bus each morning. I do not share these memories. And one has to ask, if it were true: Why did no one ever fill in said hole?)

The Stressed Version of Your Marriage

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Missed Part I, Questions to Understand THE STRESSED VERSION OF YOURSELF? Grab it here.

One of the unexpected delights of our final couple of months in Africa was the arrival of a college friend who’s known my husband and I since the beginning. She watched us meet, cautiously date, giddily become engaged. She played the piano when the two of us spring chickens said “I do” forever. Later, I stood with her as she spoke her own vows beneath a spreading tree. And when she visited us in Africa and we stayed up entirely too late, she gave us this gift: I told my husband, “I love that she reminds us how good we are together. That you and I together are a really good thing.”

I wrote before that this time of leaving Africa, of setting a foot on two highly divergent continents, has delivered unavoidable stress to our relationship. Both of us are strained, so it makes sense that our most intimate relationships would bear that weight. So it was kind of God to remind us that despite the ways we occasionally feel like the losers in a three-legged-race right now—“us” is still a really good thing.

Part I of this post outlined some essential reasons we need to identify when we’re stressed. If you’re convinced, let’s get down to it. What are the signs your marriage is under stress?

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