THE AWKWARD MOM

because uncomfortable conversations are the ones worth having

Category: love languages

Marriage Myth: If I’m amazing enough, my spouse will want me right. Now.

March 12, 2019 / / 0 Comments
Reading Time: 3 minutes

romance want sexy Like most American women, I am a total sucker for rom-coms and TV drama with a smattering of romance. Who doesn’t love someone being swept off their feet, and laughing at all the stupid ways it goes wrong? Even after 18 years of marriage, I still love…love. Plus, there’s this (usually false?) idea that you’re getting a glimpse of the private stuff we never talk about.

As a writer and real person, I like to think myself immune from the illusions of a perfect husband. When a guy delivers an ingenious, sentimental line, I sometimes imagine the scriptwriter scrawling on a legal pad, grinning because she got it just right. (And if he’s saying something just right from a woman’s perspective, there’s a decent chance the scriptwriter was female.)

But a podcast recently pointed out something else to me. In Hollywood, couples–even married ones–don’t usually have a ton of needed lead time to…well. To get it on (fade to black). read more

Just My Type: Enneagram Compatibility (INFOGRAPHIC)

January 25, 2019 / / 1 Comment
Reading Time: 3 minutes

I first took the enneagram about a year ago when my family mentioned it. (Yes, my whole family talks about this kind of stuff. If you’re into a sports team or politics, we might not be able to help you out).

With a husband who’s a Human Resources exec, you can bet I’ve taken my share of personality tests. (I’ve even tried to outwit some of them?)

Personally, the enneagram has brought me more self-knowledge–knowledge that actually helped me truly change–than any of the others. I even keep basic profiles on my Kindle. (Yeah. I’m one of those.) With 207 subtypes, I’ve found it to be fairly accurate for me, which hasn’t always been the case with other profiles. read more

Best Posts of 2018!

December 27, 2018 / / 0 Comments
Reading Time: 4 minutes

Blogging can be a little too much like having an imaginary friend.

Picture sitting at the smallest table at your coffee shop. (I’m having a seasonal special with half of the pumps, decaf. …Because as someone told me, with natural enthusiasm like mine, I should remain uncaffeinated. You?) read more

Love, Disappointed: How We’re Misled by Love Languages

October 30, 2018 / / 0 Comments
Reading Time: 4 minutes

So you already know I’m into This is Us; at least we’ve got that out of the way. (Still waiting for an episode that doesn’t make me blink away tears. Good grief. I am such a sap.)

But there were two moments I resonated with in the last episode–which, if you’re a parent of a teenager, or a child in general, will likely echo with you even if you have no idea what I’m talking about.

Twice, an adult character was talking with a teen close to them. And they were each shut down with finality. Both of the adult characters, disappointment etched on their faces, simply had to absorb their rejection.

Freebie Fridays: FREE Printable Love Languages “Cheat Sheet”

September 16, 2016 / / 0 Comments
Reading Time: 2 minutes

freebie-fridays

If you’re new to the “love languages” concept, check out the 5 Love Languages website. love languages text

Happy Friday, everyone! This week I’m excited to offer this free, printable 5-page “Cheat Sheet” to the 5 Love Languages: Twenty practical, innovative ideas per love language: words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, physical touch, and quality time. (If you’re not sure which of the love languages your spouse, kids, and friends “speak”, try this quiz.) Print them all, or only the love languages you need. read more

26 Super-practical parenting hacks

December 7, 2015 / / 3 Comments
Reading Time: 3 minutes

26 parenting hacks

Now you’re speaking my love language: 20 ways to display affection through acts of service

September 11, 2015 / / 1 Comment
Reading Time: 3 minutes

1.Knock out that item on her to-do list she just hasn’t gotten to. 2.What little touches could better make your home a “prepared place”--like God creates for us--that’s comforting, encouraging, and uplifting, so family and guests feel embraced? For guests, it may be the basket of extra toiletries next to the cozy towel in the bathroom; for kids, you could have a favorite snack ready when he arrives home; help him remove his backpack.

Now you’re speaking my [love] language: 20 ways to express affection through physical touch

September 4, 2015 / / 0 Comments
Reading Time: 2 minutes

1.Put an arm around his or her shoulder. 2.Hug them in the morning, or when they arrive home, or to wish them good night. 3.Sit next to each other while watching a movie. 4.Throw your arms around their neck while they’re sitting in a chair.

Now you’re speaking my [love] language: 20 ideas to show love through words of affirmation

August 28, 2015 / / 1 Comment
Reading Time: 2 minutes

love languages text

If you’re new to the love languages concept, check out the 5 Love Languages website. And here’s their post on The Power of Affirming Words.

  1. Scrawl a note on a napkin in their lunch: Praying for you today. So proud of you.
  2. Use a dry erase marker on the mirror, or on glazed wall tiles: You rock my world. Thanks for being you.
  3. “I respect you so much for your ability to __.”
  4. Send a text after the big day, meeting, presentation, or test, checking up on how it went and reminding them you were praying. (Set a reminder on your phone or computer if you need help remembering!)
  5. “Even on days when you’re ___, I’m so glad you’re mine.”
  6. “Am I making you feel understood?”
  7. Leave sticky note on their steering wheel or in their backpack. Just to let you know that I love you.
  8. “Your _[personality trait]_ is so just what our family needs.”
  9. Send a love note or, for a child, a letter through the mail, just letting them know what you appreciate about them. Be descriptive and sincere.
  10. Get specific: “You do ___ really well.”
  11. “Tell me more about what that was/is like for you.”
  12. On small strips of paper, write or type things you love about them and great memories you have. Wrap them around individual candies of his or her favorite kind!
  13. “When you did ___ for me, it made my day go so much easier/made my day. Thanks for doing that!”
  14. Remember: Go for quality of words more than quantity. Communicate that when you affirm them, your words aren’t inflated; they’re trustworthy.
  15. “Looking at circumstances, I’m getting the idea that you might not be feeling very ___ lately. Wanted to let you know that I see so much _[character quality]_ in you, and at the risk of sounding corny–I’m proud of you.”
  16. “You make me so happy just by being you.”
  17. Send an e-mail or Facebook message: Just wanted to let you know that I’ve seen the way you’re trying so hard to ___. I love it, and I love you.
  18. “Got a minute to tell me how you’ve been–really? I’d love to get the inside story on what you’ve been thinking about and going through.”
  19. “I respect you so much for the way you ___.”
  20. “I realize you and I haven’t been completely on the same page recently. Just wanted to let you know I’d never trade the privilege of being your[mom/dad/husband/wife]. And I’m totally committed to working on our relationship so we can understand and enjoy each other.”
For more ideas, check out  52 Things to Say to Make Your Child Feel Great and 50 Things to Say to Make Your Husband Feel Great. 

What has someone said to you that made your day–or changed you?

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