questions to understand subcultureAuthor’s note to newcomers: Our family of origin—or the culture in our own homes—has a considerable impact on our work, our rest, the lens through which we interpret relationships, our kids, our conversation, our spirituality, even our sex life (betcha didn’t think you’d find them in there!).

Plus, I just think it’s plain interesting to understand where we came from—as someone who lives in a different culture that’s helped me better understand my own. It’s helped me be more gracious, more wise, more self-knowledgeable (which helps me be more aware in my relationship with God), and hopefully more holy.

Remember when using these to imagine tacking on the end of every question, Why? and How did this affect you and/or your family?

If you missed the first post, see here for the ideas behind this serieshere for the second installmentthe third, the fourth, the fifth, the sixth, and the seventh.

  1. Here’s a tough one. What’s a significant event from your family history that you feel doesn’t affect you? Sometimes those areas in our family history which we least suspect can leave us vulnerable. Sometimes we’re determined to put them behind us; sometimes they’re so ingrained in our family’s ways of life, we don’t even realize their presence.
  2. In what areas are your siblings employed and/or trained? How did your parents’ respond to their children’s natural gifting and passions? You might be interested in this post on 6 ways to help your child grow into their areas of giftedness.
  3. How did your mother react to your father’s career? How did your father react to your mother’s career?
  4. What was the balance of genders in your family? Did you have more boys than girls, vice versa, or a fairly even distribution? Were the personalities in one gender more dominant?
  5. Finish this sentence: Of all the things my family did for me, I’m so thankful they gave me…
  6. Finish this sentence: If I could have one thing that I didn’t really receive from my family in my childhood [or now], it would be…
  7. Talk about a time when you remember pleasing your parents.
  8. Describe one of the times you remember your parents being the most angry with you. What had you done? How did they react?
  9. This can be painful—but describe ways that you regret treating family members.
  10. For what characteristics or responses in your parent(s) or siblings have you grown in compassion and/or understanding?
  11. Describe an anecdote which served as an “aha!” moment to understanding a parent or sibling.
  12. Describe some of your favorite memories when you were on your own with each of your parents.
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